Friday, 11 December 2015

Battle Bunnies 20 Legions of Xmas: *Cough-Splutter-Burp-Sigh*

On the Eleventh day of Xmas Santa gave to me: 
*Cough-er-ahem*
Ten Ma-chine addicts
9 Angels weeping
Psy-chos a' skin-in'
Seven breachers breaching
Russ-is-a-slaying
Sa-vage laugh-ing kill-ers!
Dirty ditch diggers
Per-fect-ion
+++Records Expunged+++
And a Legion full of mys-ter-y


Legion: XI
Name: *Sniff-hack-er*
Former Names: *Achoo!*
Primarch: *Hack!-splutter-sniff*
First Captain at outbreak of Heresy: *Errr-achoo-cough*
Forge World Paint scheme: Spray the marine black then- *achoo! - snort wheeze* before edge highlighting with *gargle-burp-cough*

Alternative Paint scheme: *Snort-ahem!*

Typical 2500pt list:
HQ:
*Cough-wheeze*

Troops:
10 *Achoo!-sniff* marines with *cough* 
10 *Ack-urrp-fart*
5 *snort-hack-errr*

Elites:
A *cough* with a heavy bolter! Boom!
5 *Hack-cough-er-splutter*

Fast Attack:
*Dribble*....
*Cough-ahem-achoooooo!* with *fart*

Heavy Attack
A squadron of *Cooough! ACHOO!* with *sniiiiff*

Lord of War:
Primarch *Cough-burp-fart*



List Summary:
I chose these options because it goes with the eleventh legions way of war. Do you remember when *cough* fought against the *sniff* on *hack*? That is one of my favourite compliance  because *fart* is the most fool-proof tactic ever! No-one could beat that level of planning! That is the theme I went for. Nice and *hack* so that *sniff* can *burp* with a purple monkey dishwasher.

I really thought my cold was going to affect tonight's post. I am so glad it hasn't. 

Kaelo

18 comments:

  1. Never has being sick been so funny.

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  2. *fart* is a bona fide fool proof tactic for the XI legion! The purple monkey dishwasher would be proud.

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    1. I believe the death guard have exclusive use of the term "fart", since the compliance of "Uranus".

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  3. I absolutely need one pot of "*gargle-burp-cough*" paint, I can only imagine the fascinating uses it might have :D

    And btw, might it be that the XXth legion wasn't the only one with a double primarch? Seeing this one lists both "*Hack!-splutter-sniff*" and "*Cough-burp-fart*" as their primarch. Surely, Leman would have had a hard (and messy) time dealing with them XD

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    Replies
    1. Haha!! I guess my bodily functions lost control in different ways when discussing he/she/it lol

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  4. Well the only thing certain about the 11th, was they "cough" and employed a great many "gurrrrrrh".

    Also the space wolves "cough, cough, cough". Which meant "cough, achoo, gurrrrh". Very exciting as I think we all agree!

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  5. Great insight into the XI Legion. Can you remember when "*Ahhhhhuuuuuummm*" told Leman Russ and Angron that best way to "*haaaaack-ca-ca*" was by sending a "*achoo*" filled with "*Fart*" and lemons to Magnus' home world and they "*achoooo*" with spoons and ate pie.

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    Replies
    1. I don't think Angron has room in his life for pie.

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  6. Thank you everyone for commenting. There are some names above that I haven't seen before or don't see often. I really hope to see you come back and talk to us in the future. We appreciate you all and would love to discuss our hobby with you in the future. So much love - the Battle Bunnies

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  7. Great post. I do wonder if the "*hack cough*" and the "*cough splutter*" legions will ever get back story.

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    Replies
    1. If FW or GW ever get the go ahead to do Great crusade miniatures then that is the only time. In my opinion.

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  8. It sounds like one of the two missing legions didn't even make it off Terra tho, based on my re-reading of the FW black books over the last few days.
    I dunno, it's one of those things, they've dragged this mystery around for decades now, we'd just be disappointed if they told us what happened :-)

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  9. Drake Seta22 March 2014 at 08:50

    I finally realized what happened to the lost legions!

    Back in the day, there were the 2nd and 11th Legions, but all records have since been lost.

    In fact, they were not lost, just misfiled!

    Back at the dawn of the Imperium, the Imperial Bureaucracy was still sorting things out, including consistent filing systems. Some departments used Arabic numerals, some Roman Numerals, and depending on the whim of whichever department head was in charge at the time, they sometimes even switched back and forth.

    Accordingly, the records for the Second legion sometimes showed as 2, sometimes as II. When it was II, those departments using Arabic numerals filed them under 11. Soon the records for the two legions were hopelessly intermingled. Orders meant for one were sent to the other half the time, leading to them spending most of their time criss-crossing the galaxy. Supplies meant for the Eleventh Legion usually ended up with the Second, leaving the Eleventh without the means to continue, hence the Imperial term "Chapter Eleven" for a group that can no longer sustain itself. When the orders to accordingly disband the impoverished Eleventh came through, it was also sent to the II legion.

    By the time the mistake was realized, it was too late. Rather than face up to the errors, correct things and wade through centuries of red tape, the Imperial Bureaucracy just swept everything under the rug, made a PowerPoint presentation about all the money they were able to save (from no longer paying for two legions, though that was not mentioned) and promptly found new things to spend the money on.

    Now you know!

    My favourite conspiracy theory I have read on the web :)

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