Bloodvar Cup Team: Da Blue Boyz

Good evening iron clad inflated squig fans!

The Bloodvar Cup, sponsored by Bloodvar - the home of beer that tastes

like blood! - is proud to introduce you to the Blue Boys! Hailing from

the inhospitable regions around Black Orc Pass.  They have all the

unfortunate traits of their race, this includes the inability to see

further than their fists.  The Blue Boys are a new team, fresh from

slaughtering hardy Dwarves and Empire Troops, eager to make a smash on

the Blood Bowl League!

The team currently consists of:

1 - Throwa - Dagga Gutstompa

2 - Throwa - Grug Teefsmasha

3 - Black Orc - Snagod Eadbasha

4 - Black Orc - Gasher Slashbanger

5 - Blitza - Razorface Necksnappa

6 - Blitza - Gotrog Fister

7 - Lineboy - Hurta Bonebreaker

8 - Lineboy - Gorsnik Gobstompa

9 - Lineboy - Zagzrug Stuntysmasher

10 - Lineboy - Heddrak Teefsmasha

11 - Lineboy - Zagruz Necksnappa

12 - Lineboy - Sluggard Deathskull

13 - Lineboy - Gazark Fistsmasha (was too busy fighting to get a picture done)

We are lucky enough to have a syndicated report from Bob Bobbinson and

the coach Snotpicker Crotchscratcher of the blue boys

Bob Bobbinson:  So facebitter, how do you think the blue boys will do?

facebitter Snotfinga: its da bloo boyz, blooming can't speak poppa

Bob Bobbinson: urn, sorry about that Facebitter, do you have any

interesting and game plans mapped out?

facebitter Snotfinga: Nah, we is gunna punch the others teams in da

face.  We is da strongest.  Dos utha yella orcs is wimpy too.  Weez

gunna step on dem.  Dem, fancy pointies need a good squishing to.

Wees is gonna step on da ijuts dat fall down too!

Bob Bobbinson: So, orc tend to be less agile on the pitch than other

teams, how do you plan on getting the ball over the line?

facebitter Snotfinga: Wots da ball?

Bob Bobbinson: You get the ball over the line to score

facebitter Snotfinga: ......

Bob Bobbinson: To win the trophy?

facebitter Snotfinga: Der is a tropy?

Bob Bobbinson: Yes

facebitter Snotfinga: Can u hit stuff wiv it?

Bob Bobbinson: ......

So yes, interesting stuff from the Blue Boys camp.

Bloodvar Cup Team: Crookshank Squealers

Team: Crookshank Squealers 

Race: Skaven 

Captain: Blistok Tangleslicer

Coach: Fatark Ripwinkler

Colours: Red and white 

Team logo: triangular snow capped mountain with 2 rats beneath. One white looking to the left. The other black looking to the right

Team motto: "If we don't die today, we may die tomorrow "

Owner: John Matthews 

No.1 Skeep Ripbiter - Blitzer

Scarred beyond recognition. Skeep has a deathwish. His aim is to play well and die on the pitch. (Just like most of the team)

No.2 Skititch Clawspike - Gutter Runner

The youngest on the team, he's desperate to prove his worth and become the best he can. While he still lives.

No.9 Blistok Tangleslicer- Lineman

Captain of the team. Mainly because despite his efforts he survives from game to game. Still hoping for a glorious death on the pitch.

Coaches pre-league comments:

Well I have beside me quite a young team from the mountains. There are a few gnarly old veterans amongst them. We play in honour of our neighbouring tribesmen, the GhostVermin. They were a tribe of albinos. They were massacred by their pet rat ogre. Which is why we'll never hire one.

The whole team are hunting for their deaths on the pitch. They want to meet the GhostVermin in the afterlife.

Bloodvar Cup Team: Da Badland Bruisers

Hello everyone,

I'm back again to introduce my blood bowl team Da Badland Bruisers!

I painted the team to match my AoS Orruks as it's a scheme I know well and I just wanted to get a table top standard team on the table as soon as possible before the league starts.

The make up of the team is just a standard line up at the moment, as I didn't want to buy a another box for more blitzers and black orks but that may change in time. So I'll introduce the team below...

Throwers

First on the team sheet at squad number 1 is the teams talisman thrower Gorzod or 'Great Zod' as he is known to the mostly faithful and violent ork and goblin fans of Da Badland Bruisers.

Accompanying him is Gorzods competition, the younger and ever ambitious thrower Gorsnik Defflobba. At squad number 12 he is not a first team starter.... yet.


Black Orks

Next at squad number 2 is the teams captain, the experienced and brutish Ghaskull Ironjaw. He rules over the team and keeps them in line on pitch and the players always have someone to rally behind even when he isn't smashing and injuring the oppositions players!

Next at squad number three is Vargan Ironfist. A young but massive black ork who is keen to learn from Ghaskull who he calls Da Big Boss. To the annoyance of his team manager.


Blitzers

These orks were picked for being faster than the other orks in their armour and they are key players in the team. Although at squad number 4 is Torek Gorefoot a cocky player who likes to show off his skill and speed to the crowd, whether it costs the team a match remains to be seen.

At squad number 5 is Ulrak Skullcrumpa, where Torek likes to show off his speed, Ulrak likes to use his speed to smash opponents down relying on his thick armour to protect himself.


Lineman

The cheap and expendable part of the team, these orks are desperately trying to demonstrate their speed, catching or throwing ability to the manager to increase their standing in the team. The most experienced and best lineman is number 6 Dagran Bonesplitta who seems content at being smashed by opponents and doing his own smashing in return.

For the others this is the season to prove themselves or they will be replaced... At 7 there is Zagruz Gutstompa, 8 Snargod Da Bruiser, at 9 Gorak Da Gored, 10 Dagga Teefsmash and 11 Heddrak Fistsmasha.

Coaches Comments

As far as predicting the season ahead goes, I think we have to remain realistic about what we can acheive. I think to win the league we need more black orks and blitzers as the team has very few abilities other than the extra strength on the black orks and the heavy armour. Against humans I believe we can do well, however, the skaven are an unknown team to us but I doubt we will have the speed to cope with them, so smashing them is our best hope. Finally the dwarves will be the toughest test as their almost team wide blocking ability really makes it hard for an ork team that can't out muscle the opposition.

So lets just try 'n' smash em boyz...

Stay tuned to see how Da Badland Bruisers fair this season!

Thanks for reading,

Aveinus Kaane

Bloodvar Cup Team: Skavenblight Scramblers 3rd Team

Howdy Guys and Girls :)

Today we have a special report from the Bloodvar Cup - the legendary Skavenblight Scramblers (well, their third team!)! They are quite fame and are an international team, so they aren't really participating in the ongoing league, but they already played a pre-season "friendly" match against the Blightchester Gutter Cutters. I won't say much about that game, but I had to replace some dead ratmen ...

Team: Skavenblight Scramblers (3rd Team)
Race: Skaven
Captain: Waldgol Ripbiter (Thrower)
Coach: Wikkilichs the Grey Prophet (Skaven)
Colours: Black, Green, Red and Gold
Team Motto: "Some leagues here, some knifes there, soon we are only known as 'The Skavenblight Scramblers'!"
Owner: The City of Skavenblight, represented through Lady Atia

Starting Team:

1. Shifink Tangleslicer (Gutter Runner)
2. Mut Skitterbolt (Gutter Runner)
3. Blistok Clawspike (Gutter Runner)
4. Shifink Scattersprint (Gutter Runner)

5. Captain Waldgol Ripbiter (Thrower)

6. Mut Scattersprint (Blitzer)
7. Skeep Scattersprint (Linemen)
8. Abscitt Bloodtooth (Linemen)
9. Ratbolt Greendrinker (Linemen)
10. Gnarfbolt the Hunched (Linemen)

13. Thanghul the Reborn (Rat Ogre)

Coach's comment after their failure during the sponsored pre-Season friendly match:

"Wait, we lost against these second class vermin? Good for you that ol' Vytik isn't here to see that. Anyways, I'll better send that Lemmiwinks some kind of winner's price though - something to 'motivate' his boys. Also, can someone use the warpstone-defibrillator on Thangul?"

Bloodvar Cup Team: The Buchafen Bees

Team: Buchafen Bees
Race: Human
Captain: Meinholf, No 6.
Coach: Farald Rheingold (Human)
Colours: Yellow, black and white
Team Motto: "If nothing else works, a total pig-headed unwillingness to look facts in the face will see us through"
Owner: Hector Cephas

Team Roster:

1. Vargg Smart (Ogre)
2. Flarkot Advar (Blitzer)
3. Jory Valred (Blitzer)
4. Baron Bosch (Blitzer)
5. Edwin Fentleberry (Blitzer)
6. Meinholf (Captain, Thrower)
7. Duke Panzermann (Lineman)
8. Marquis Farren (Lineman)
9. Jekil Wulf (Lineman)
10. Uther Slodar (Catcher)
11. Odamar Roblor (Catcher)
12. Detlef Farren (Lineman)

Team Photo:

Rear: Varg Smart, Duke Panzermann, Flarkot Advar, Uther Slodar, Marquis Farren, Jory Valred, Farald Rheingold

Front: Baron Bosch, Odamar Roblor, Jekil Wulf, Edwin Fentleberry, Meinholf, Detlef Farren

Coach's pre-season comments:

"Some people believe Bloodbowl is a matter of life and death. I'm very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that.

"If we're going to win the league this year, we're going to have to finish ahead of all the other teams and we've got as good a chance as everyone else of doing that. I would not be bothered if we lose every game as long as we win the league."

Captains pre-season comments:

"It's all about the two M's - movement and positioning. Slodar has still got the same legs as he did five years ago and the ageless 30-year-old Bosch will see us through alright.

"If we just give it a 110%, we'll be good."

Bloodvar Cup Team: Blightchester Gutter Cutters

Team: Blightchester Gutter Cutters 

Race: Skaven

Captain: "Chewy" No 1.

Coach: Lord Lemmiwinks (Skaven)

Colours: Red, Black, Bronze and White

Team logo: Forward facing Rat skull on red vertical stripe. 

Team Motto: "No Gutter too deep no pipe too high, the Bloodvar trophy will be mine"

Owner: Drake Seta

Starting team: 

No1 - Rat Ogre: "Chewy"

Chewy is the newest club member. He immediately decided that he should Captain the team and ate the previous Captain Skruth Talontail. Ever since then the team and the Coach give in to his every request, for fear of their lives. His tactics are yet to be tested, but if his hostility is anything to go by, it will be a bloody league. 

No2 - Sarin Darkslicer and No3 - Abscitt Gutripper. 

These two Gutter Runners have been training by baiting and teasing Chewy forcing themselves to avoid him at all times, so much so that they do not share any pipes or caves on away games, and only appearing just before kick off much to Chewy's fury. 

No4, No5, No6, No7, No8 and No9 - Linemen. 

No9 "the Feltched" was destined to be the next Captain at the time of his consumption. Unfortunately he is now a shadow of his former self after "the incident" which happened in a pre-league friendly against the Gottledamn Ogres, an incident that earns his moniker. . . 

No4 Nibblet Bloodclaw is one to look out for, with the Blood Bowl League already trying to poach him. 

No10 - Spike Bloodspitter and No11 - Quitch Pipeslicer

These two were chosen to be Blitzers, mainly on the fact they were former bodyguards of Lord Lemmiwinks, and they did so well at stopping "Chewy" from eating their Coach. They are really looking forward to causing some damage on the pitch. 

No12 - Ratbolt (to be hired)

Coaches pre-league comments:

Yess. I am thoroughly looking forward to this league . . . Our Captain. . . is a strong Captain with excellent tactics. . . I think he will take us far. . . (Shakes his head and sighs). 

Our Gutter Runners have been training like their lives depend on it (Whispers: which it does thanks to Chewy), and I expect great things from them. I was torn between hiring two more talented Gutter Runners which my scout has had an eye on or hiring "Chewy". But Chewy insisted he was the Rat for the job and even brought his own contract made in blood for me to sign (whispers: whilst he squeezed me until I signed him). 

The Gutter Cutters feel positive and hope to do well against most teams. We are not looking forward to the Dwarves though. Pesky little bastards. Oh I can't say bastards? Sorry. Pesky little arse holes. . . . what? Oh please we all have them. . . (Eyes un focus and whispers: some have even been up them. . .)